getting lost=a good workout!

is anyone getting bored of this thing yet?  just wondering haha.  well overall i had a good weekend.  yes, i ate a bit more than i should've, drank a decent amount of beer, but i did go running saturday and monday morning, which i was proud of.  and btw, it was hot as hell!  i'm glad i got my ass out, if i'm going to indulge a bit i feel better about it if i throw some exercise in there! 


today i attempted another bike/run combo, with a little more success than last time!  i biked around monroe today, was shooting for 15 miles, ended up doing 16.  i got a bit lost in a couple of developments so i did most of my miles riding around trying to find my way out!  had never been in those developments so was doing some house hunting as well :)  killed two birds with one stone!  the biking isn't too bad, it gets a little hard around mile 9, but then once  i go a couple more miles it gets a little easier because i know i only have a few left.  so i got home, put on my running shoes and started running.  again, the transition sucks!  i wish i could explain it better, but i just feel all discombobulated.  i ran about a mile, and i swear it wasn't until after 1/2 mile that it started feeling a little more normal.  but barely, and i still felt like i was barely moving!  at least i did a longer distance this time!  but i'm glad i started doing this, and i'm definitely keeping it up, going to practice that at least twice a week.  i only have a little over 2 months left!  i can't believe it!  


so i think i'm over that weird slump i was in, feeling really motivated and making my workouts a priority.  and my sweet tooth has been mostly curbed, mostly....except these damn berry burst oreos i got for abby are killing me!  i only had 2 today, so not bad!  as long as i keep it to one or two a day, i'll be happy with that.  and when they're gone, i'm not buying them again!

feeling good :)

ok gonna get this done for today because i'm sure i won't feel like it later!  yesterday i had denise.  what an awesome workout!!  she mixed in some boxing and kickboxing with some running and other core/upper body exercises.  oh yeah, and of course squats and these side steps she makes me do with an elastic band around my ankles.  hmmm, did i miss anything?  the boxing was great.  been a long time since i got to hit the pads like that.  and i gave her quite a workout having to hold them!  she worked up a sweat as well!  ahhhhh soooo love that though, it was a lot of fun and i sweat my ass off.  


now i never know how i'm going to feel the next day after i train with her, most days i can't walk, so i either have my day off, or i'll do the elliptical because its no impact and the only thing i can manage!  but we had a bbq at my house last night, and although i did not eat too bad, i did have some dessert plus a few beers, so i really wanted to get a good workout in.  so i went out for a run, total distance almost 3.5 miles.  couldn't run the whole distance, most of it, but walked a little during the last mile.  my legs were a bit sore from yesterday, and it was really hot already.  but i was proud that i even went out at all!  and i ran most of it.  so i'm off to a good start this weekend, which is important since the weekends are always the hardest to manage.  well hope everyone has a great weekend, enjoy this beautiful weather!

good surprise!

well i got a nice surprise this morning!  i LOST weight!  i am in total shock.  i haven't weighed myself all week just because i felt like i wasn't doing well, so i didn't want the extra disappointment.  i decided to weigh-in this morning because i have denise today, and i wanted to see exactly how much trouble i was going to be in, and get my excuses ready to go haha.  and what do you know, i actually lost.  astounding.  and this loss pushed me past another goal i was reaching for--getting below 180.  i believe this could possibly spark my re-motivation, since i have promised myself that once i get below a certain point, i do not cross back over that line.  meaning, once i got below 190, i never went back there again.  so now i have to STAY below 180.  and what perfect timing, right before a holiday weekend.  yay!


yesterday i ended up going for a 12 mile bike ride after i dropped abby off at school. now i have to say, i am NOT a fan of road biking.  first of all, once you put that helmet on you look like a total dork.  biking is very demoralizing. i'm sitting in the parking lot of abby's school, all the moms driving by me, and manalapan moms mind you, while i'm getting all suited up for biking.  thankfully i could kind of hide behind the pilot.  its just impossible to look cool on a bike.  i did a 4 mile loop 3 times, and of course the first loop the chain came off while i was shifting.  on a main road!  and i'm scared as it is to ride on the road!  so i had to pull over, fix it, and then continue riding.  awesome.  then when i got done with the bike, i decided i would try to run a bit to see how i'd do.  i have done this at the gym, gone from the stationary bike to the treadmill with very little problem.  omg it was awful!  what a strange transition!  your body feels so weird and unnatural, i can't explain it.  my legs felt like they were barely moving, and i think i went about a half mile and couldn't run anymore!  i was talking to kara about it and she has experienced the same thing.  definitely have to get used to that, much more practice needed! at least i tried it and realized it early enough where i have lots of time to work on it.  


so today i have denise, we are boxing!!!  she has pretty much been doing strength training workouts with me, which i love, its a nice break from the other stuff.  i haven't boxed in so long i am really looking forward to it!


enjoy the weekend, looks like it is going to be beautiful!  my goal is to workout in the mornings, and enjoy the day whether we are bbq'ing or whatever, but in moderation so i don't wake up tuesday morning feeling guilty and miserable.  have a good one!

apparently i love mornings!!

up super early again!  a little after 5 today which is just pure insanity.  abby got up to pee, but came in my room first to give me a kiss, tell me she loves me and to sleep tight.  super sweet, i love her dearly.  but after she wakes me up, i realize i have to pee, and then i am too awake.  i just couldn't fall back asleep.  and these mother f'n birds are just chirping away.  i know people like that, hearing the little birdies chirping in the morning, but i just want to shoot them right out of the damn trees.  however i will say it does look very pretty outside, sun is coming up, blue sky, quiet and peaceful.  i can see why some are morning people. there really isn't any other time of the day thats like this.  maybe my body is telling me i should be a morning person.  who knows!


so this really has been a crap week for me with my eating/training.  i haven't done anything i said i was going to do, like writing stuff down, kick things up a notch, blah blah blah.  i need someone to kick my ass.  can i sit here and make excuses? of course. wanna hear 'em?  probably not, but you've already started reading so you might as well continue haha. yesterday i had a whole plan, spin in the AM cuz i haven't done it in a while, and its more fun than the stationary bike, but abby slept until 10 so i missed the class. and i didn't want to go to the gym late, cuz i had very important beach plans, and had to be back for abby's t-ball game, which ran late so it was too late to work out after.....yeah, sounds like someone with her priorities straight!  couldn't go to the gym late cuz i didn't want to get to the beach late and spend less time there.  so its thursday, and all i've done this week (other than the 5k) is a 40 min bike ride on monday, and 40 min swim on tuesday.  that's just not gonna cut it.  


ok, on to the eating.  i'm pretty sure i've figured that out.  another excuse, yes.  but an issue i am now seriously thinking i need to obtain professional assistance for. so....today was my due date.  i obviously knew it was coming, if the baby was actually born today, would've been his/her first bday.  so not the best day for me.  i thought about it over the weekend, told myself to just let it go, i can't keep getting upset every year at this time.  ha.  fat chance. anyways, don't really want to re-hash this whole thing but all i will say is that its upsetting to me that i get all thrown for a loop still when i'm having some emotional shit going on.  i have a book, about emotional eating.  maybe i should actually read it. i have a book about moving on after the loss of a baby.  maybe i should read that too.  while i do like self-help books, they're just hard to read.  not entertaining, remind you of your crap, not fun in the least.  but i should just read them and get it over with and see if they help.  


ok, so i'm not going to make any big proclamations today.  just going to try and get through the day, eat well and get a good workout in.  and maybe open one of those books.  

bad girl

ugh up early once again.  you'd think with all the exercise i'd sleep like a baby.  other than those few days i wasn't feeling well i can hardly sleep past 6:30 anymore!  it sucks!!!  yeah, i know some of you are up that early every day, but when you have a kid that sleeps until at least 8 every morning and i have absolutely no reason to get up it really blows.  oh well!  i probably should get my ass outta bed and do something but i just lay here and pout that i'm not sleeping haha.  anyways, yesterday was not the day i was hoping for.  went to the gym later in the day before abby's swim lesson, and planned on doing a longer bike ride and some weights after that.  but i got to the gym, went into denise's office to make our appt for this week, and ended up talking to her about the race for like 20 mins, so then i only had time to ride the bike for like 40 mins, and no weights.  i could've done more during her swim lesson, but i like to watch her, and they were also testing so i wanted to see how she was doing.  (she did great :))  but i did get a semi-decent ride in that short amount of time, just upped the level so it would be harder.  then my neighbor texted me at 9:15 last night to go for a walk, and we went out for about an hour so at least i got a little more exercise in.  better than nothing!  

and i guess i have to be honest here, although i'm embarrassed to admit it, i jumped at the chance to go walking with her because i am having the hardest time with eating!!  not so much regular food, but with sweets!!  which is strange for me because usually its the food i want more of.  but lately i want a damn package of cookies after every meal!  i do like a little sweet after lunch or dinner, sometimes both, but i can have like 2 hershey's miniatures, or something small like that, get the taste, and be completely satisfied.  omg, yesterday, after dinner, i had a pack of 100 calorie chocolate graham crackers, a handful of those mini-non-pareils, and then 4 small chips ahoy cookies.  i NEVER do that, so  wtf is going on with me????  and i know its so bad but i do it anyway!!  grrrrrr.  i gotta cut that shit out.  and no, its not my "time" either.  so i have decided to go back to writing down what i eat every day so i can stay accountable.  i swear, i am the most self-sabotaging person ever!  its aggravating, i'm like in a war with myself.  hopefully its just some weird phase my body is going through.  today is a swim day, and then i'll probably do the weights after that since i didn't do them yesterday.  and keep my sudden over-active sweet tooth in check!!

5K numero dos

today was the YMCA 5k, my second one since i started all this training.  like i said, this week i wasn't feeling great and wasn't expecting a good performance today.  even when i woke up i was feeling tired despite going to bed super early last night.  my friend kara and her fam picked me up (the kids were coming to cheer us on!) and i was just feeling like this wasn't going to go well for me!  did a little warm-up, little stretching and then it was time to line up.  i wished kara good luck and she shot off ahead of me.  i got passed by just about everyone right from the beginning (it was a smaller scale race) and i was struggling.  legs heavy already, low on energy.  i said to myself, nope, you're not going to make it, no friggin way.  the course was a loop you ran 3 times.  i told myself run one loop and then just walk it til the end.  that first mile was tough!  i ran it in a little less than 12 mins, and as i saw the time i said, man, if i just kept up this pace i'll beat my previous time.  so i kept running, but was really feeling crappy.  my legs felt horrible and i was not breathing great.  but i was starting to tell myself to just keep going, that i was tougher than this.  its only 3 miles, if i could do it in march, i can do it today.  2nd mile sucked.  the course was a mix of gravel trail, pavement, grass and sand.  once i got to the grassy part i was really having to push myself because it was slightly uphill, uneven ground, so you have to put in more of an effort.  i make a lot of noise so i'm like grunting and groaning haha, but i made it through that part, back to the pavement,  shortly after that passed the time and saw that i had done that mile in a little over 12 1/2 mins.  so still on pace to beat my other time. at that point, i was like, shit, you thought you'd be walking at this point, you have one mile to go, just keep running.  i was bound and determined to beat the time.  somehow i found a bit of energy and picked up my pace a bit, and when i looped around and saw the time again,(you actually passed the clock twice, once at the mile marker, and then the track looped around the building and back up past the clock again) it said 28, and i was already into the third mile, so i got excited because from that point it would've had to take me about 13 mins to tie my previous time. i was like, you've already got some of the 3rd mile gone and there's no way its going to take you that long from this point to finish.  so again, trying to keep up this faster pace, and then i get to the grassy part again.  i was like, just haul ass through it, get back to the pavement and sprint to the finish.  and thats exactly what i did!  groaning the whole time!  and then as i'm getting closer to the finish, i see kara running back towards me, with a bottle of water, cheering me on to the finish.  so i get closer and see the clock says 36, so i was like, holy shit!!  i'm really going to do it!!  then i really took off and make it just over 37 mins.  not sure of the exact official time, i have to see when its posted, but i think its around 37:15.  i honestly have no idea how i did it.  running is a funny thing.  just when you don't think you could possibly make it any further somehow you just pull it out of your ass and totally surprise yourself.  which is what kara said to me before the race started....that i just might surprise myself!  i'm not even being dramatic, i can not believe i finished with a lower time.  totally proves this shit is mostly mental.  physically i felt like crap, but once i actually started telling myself i could do it, i kicked ass.  well, for me haha.  kara finished 10 mins ahead of me (and she was unhappy!  go figure!)  at one point, i saw her running one way and i yelled out to her she better not lap me :)


so, it ended up being a great day, i was beyond excited, and this is just what i needed to get this resurgence of energy towards my training.  i only have a little over 2 months left to train and can't afford to slack off now.  thanks kara for the end of the run encouragement!!  i need someone to do that for me every race....mike did it the first one, hmmm, who can i pay to run next to me at the tri and yell at me to keep going????

wow long time no write

i can't believe how long its been since i've written!!!  how horrible.  you guys have probably given up on me.  ok, well let's start out with the excuses.....was on vacation, was dealing with abby's allergy issues the week we came back, then this past week i wasn't feeling too well so i was going to bed pretty early every night.  it really has been a crazy couple of weeks.  i hope i haven't lost all my followers, cuz i had so many :)  


well let's start out with vaca.  cayman was amazing as usual.  i did workout about 5 of the days there, did the treadmill and/or bike.  i only ended up swimming 2 of the days we were there.  honestly, i didn't like it at all.  it was extremely hard and i swallowed a lot of salt water which burns your throat.  the only good thing that came out of it was i changed my breathing pattern so every other stroke i take a breath ( i was doing this to avoid picking my head up on the ocean side, cuz when i did i swallowed water from the waves).  its different from the way i was taught, but since i've been home i've been swimming this way and i am seriously doing SO much better in the pool.  the length of my tri is between 26 & 27 laps, and i did 28 laps in 25 minutes.  that is the best i have ever done, and under the time that will disqualify me.  yay!!  so now i am so much less worried about the swim.  just took one little tweak.  


i have also gone on a couple of long bike rides, which was hard for me because i'm terrified of riding the bike on busy roads!  so far i am still alive.   


ok, so now the issues.  the last two weeks have not been stellar as far as my training is concerned.  i have not lost any more weight, and my running is worse.  waaaahhhhh.  my fault, indeed.  i definitely have had a lot going on, and i have been working out, but i feel like some of the workouts have been rushed, and somewhat inconsistent.  like i've probably only run like 4 times in the last two weeks, and i have a 5k sunday.  i ran a little over 2 miles this morning, and i honestly don't know how much further i could've gone without needing to take a walk break.  pathetic!!  i'm going to do worse this time than i did in march :(  this week was tough because i wasn't feeling very well, was all congested so when i exercised it was hard to breathe, plus i was so tired.  i actually went to bed a couple of times at around 10 this week and slept until after 8, which is a lot of sleep for me.  so i definitely wasn't feeling well.  but regardless, the tri isn't going to feel sorry for me.  i have the race on sunday, and then i need to step it the fuck up.  seriously, i have about 2 1/2 months left to train, and i don't want the day to be a struggle.  not looking to win obviously, but i don't want to feel like i'm dying the whole time.  so, no more fucking around, no matter what is going on, i need to make working out a top priority.  and be more accountable with my eating.  i always have trouble after i go on vacation, hard to go back to eating normal, healthy portions again!  this week has been better, but again, not stellar.  time to be stellar!!  


so, this race will start me off to stepping up the intensity on my training.  eating better, and writing this blog so i stay accountable.  NO MORE EXCUSES!!